What to do when ya have the flu

(Yeah, it rhymes : )

First, do not go pester your doctor. Or your chiropractor. Or anyone else. This is a virus. There's not a lot we can do. You'll only succeed in making your doctor about as miserable as you are.

Secondly, you won't feel like eating. And what you eat will taste lousy. I'm going to write a book called Lose 10 Pounds with Influenza! but until I do, consider it nature's way of shedding pounds for the summer. Only eat if you feel like it.

Third, you need fluids. Lots of them. Ignore what I said above about eating, and force yourself to drink lots of fluids. Lots of them. Water, of course. Probably better at room temperature, rather than cold. Broth, at the expense of our feathered friends. Maybe hot or room temperature tea. But lots of it. Probably at least a gallon a day of fluid.

Finally, sleep. We imagine (at least I do) that I'll get sick, and I'll have time to read. Wrong. I get sick, and anything more taxing than The Onion is beyond me. So sleep. A lot. And when you don't feel like sleeping, mindless TV is a great remedy. Enjoy stories about Paris Hilton. Or old movies. Or music videos. Just relax. You will feel better. I promise.